Why Do People Lie

So I’ve mentioned on more occasions than I can remember that I’ve found so many folks from my youth on this here computer. I’ve said how wonderful it has been and just don’t know how I ever got through life without them all in my life. Well, the other side of how my life has gone is the stories of theirs. To hear their stories and be allowed into their confidence is something I’m very proud of.

There is however, one subject that has come up a number of times that, well, I just don’t get. Let me preface this one with this: I’ve never been one to date or “play the field” or anything even close. I was married for almost 16 years and was completely faithful to my wife and she to me. And that very subject is what today’s lecture is all about.

So many of the women I’ve either had email, instant chat or personal conversations with have let me in on their pasts, and for that I’m grateful. A number of them have told me about their marriages, families and more. One thing that has come up far too many times is how infidelity ha infected their lives. I’m not talking about just the male doing the deed either. I used the word infected for a reason.

I look at the process of cheating in a relationship to be like a cancer in it. You know, once it starts it either spreads or just sits and festers into something that destroys more than the relationship but lives as well.

In any relationship there is a certain amount of trust. Once that trust is broken, I just don’t see how it can ever be repaired. I know I’m quite naïve about this kind of stuff but if I had found out that Shelly had cheated on me it would have simply destroyed me. I truly believe the same can be said if the shoe was on the other foot too.

That’s the part that I really don’t get. If you’re not happy in your situation, well, get out. Why cause the pain and humiliation to someone that at some point you cared very deeply about? Granted, I’ve never even been close to having the opportunity to do something like this but I just don’t see how it’s possible to look your partner in the eye after violating one of the most sacred trusts there could be.

I’d really like some input on this from you guys. If you’ve either been the victim, or the one who strayed. You don’t have to leave your name, just post to the blog anonymously. If you send me a note about it and I know who you are, I promise that your identity will never leave my head. It’s just something that has been in my head for ages and I’d really like to try to wrap my arms around it.

Thanks for indulging me once again.